Nobody wants to be here

soooo i think that i've been having a hard time with work lately. too often many of may patents have the capacity to make me cry. and i am generally a pretty tough cookie. a while back i had two patients who i dreaded working with: 1) a man who was recovering from his second stroke and 2) a lady who was recovering from a hip fracture and a few infections she encountered with hospital stay.

1) this patient was GROUCHY with a capital "G"!!! he was NOT interested in therapy. i had the hardest time trying to educate him on the roles and goals for OT. he didn't get it and wouldn't listen.  he would tell me things like "i am not going to get better" and then the next minute, he would say "i can do everything by myself" even though i just had to help him put his jacket on. he demonstrated good potential to meet his goals to regain function and improve independence in his self care activities, but he was not interested. nor was he interested in cooperating in exercises for his hemiplegic arm. it is so important at the beginning stages of therapy immediately after a stroke to exercise and regain function in the hemi arm. he didn't care. sooooo as i tried to approach the treatment sessions, he would cover his ears and shoo me away. he called me a torturer. i tried so hard! even though i was very aware that he was like this with everyone, i couldn't help but take it personally. i think it's very common for most therapists to wish that they have that "magic touch", that they can win that grouchy patient over. i sure wished that. i think that's why i took it so personally. all i wanted to say is "look! don't treat me so rudely, I AM HERE TO HELP YOU! not tortue you!" and "hey, i am on your side!!!"

2) this patient was down right RUDE! i couldn't believe it. and unlike patient #1, i really do think it was me. when i found out that she was also canadian, i thought for sure we'd found a connection... but NOPE! apparently during my first session with her i "pushed her too hard!" her daughter approached me and let me know that her mother is very stubborn and likes to do things her way and doesn't like to be told what to do. apparently when i was educating her on proper sequencing and hand placement for transferring from chair to chair it wasn't the way she liked it. generally, one of my strategies for training in my session is to allow the patient to show me how they do things first and THEN if they are struggling and unable to complete their task OR if they are very unsafe, i will interject and offer strategies. so in this particular case, i gave her the opportunity to show me how she transfers into a chair and it wasn't safe, thus i was trying to demonstrate a safer method. she didn't like it. anyhow... i think because she is very stubborn and doesn't like me telling her what to do, she decided from then on to treat me very rudely. it was hilarious at times. until one day when i'd had enough of patient #1 and #2 and had to hide myself in the bathroom because i was so emotionally exhausted. she was funny. one minute she would tell me that all she wants to do is walk (sooooo very typical for many patients. GOSH!) AND then when i would try and encourage her to walk to the bathroom, she declined stating she was too tired. i could never win. and i almost always wanted to say: "LOOK! you don't have to be so rude!!! I AM HERE FOR YOU!" and "i am on your side!"

soooo it is so hard when you have these kinds of patients. it makes me so frustrated. i don't understand why people feel entitled or justified to behave so rudely to those individuals who are there solely for them, to help them.

and one day my boss reminded me that "nobody wants to be here!" and that hit me like a tonne of bricks! i get it. the facility i work at is generally quite clean and the staff is friendly and helpful. but i get it, who wants to be here? nobody!!! well, actually, our long term residents like it though! ha! anyhow, this was a helpful reminder for me. it's really hard to put myself in my patients shoes because i've never experienced anything like they are. especially for patient #1, it is his second stroke and he has increased weakness in his arm and also cannot swallow thin liquids safely and that has to stink! anyhow... i hope one day i will be able to keep this reminder in my mind and to be a little more understanding with future grouchy patients.